Eliza's Anatomy: Vent the Fifth

Eliza's Anatomy

Everything you need to know about Eliza's Anatomy......almost everything

13 October 2008

Vent the Fifth

I need to vent what I feel for the past months. I need to vent what I've realized and/or observed for the past months. It makes me ask myself what the hell happened? Where the hell did I lose my sight on something I promised I'll look after for? How the hell did I end up like this? Why the freaking hell I feel like I'm a robot or a doll with strings that did not know she was tied on?

Yes, my dear poor readers who have to suffer AGAIN from my rants but still stayed by my side, I felt that I changed. I noticed that I changed. Especially my study habits....and something else. You know that I would never leave something so important to the last minute, right? But I did and am. That's not ME! I have no idea where THAT Eliza went. I feel like my soul is gone. I feel like I was left on a pedestal and now it has sunken in my system, I don't know what to do. I don't like this feeling, I don't like to be in this situation. It kills me to realized this and have no idea how to deal with it. I feel like I've been suppressing ALL my emotions that I forgot how to feel, how to be sympathetic. It makes me cry because I know my being empathic defines who I am, defines my life. Now that it seems it's gone, therefore I have lost the meaning of who I am; the little important microchip that keeps me going, that gives life to me.

It bugs me to say; to admit to myself that I have changed....for the bad it seemed. I don't know if I'm losing myself or it really is true. But I really really BADLY wish this is not true; that the ol'Eliza is still there, hiding somewhere. I am finding the need to be slapped and to be shouted "WAKE THE FREAKING HELL UP, you were murmuring in your sleep, you were having a nightmare." (huhu) I am finding the need to be reassured that I am just having a phase in my life especially now that I am far from "home", that I have to learn to adapt to the whole new environment I am exposed to which I will be living in for the rest of my life.

=(

posted by Eliza the Witch @ 10/13/2008 12:29:00 p.m.

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About Me

i love you like no other, but i know

you're not the one. *SM*

Name: Eliza Andrea Yuzon
Home: a house

About Me:
+ classical FREAK! (Canon in D Major is my favorite)
+ loves the violin
+ WEIRD!! (totally and loving it! and you'll love it too lol)
+ middle child (the kid who gets less attention)
+ i love GOD (Solo Dios Basta!)
+ i love my family
+ i love my FOADS&friends(including my online friends *alt+3*)
+ i love my bestest bff eva! *hugglesbackclings*
+ i would really love to go to Italy (love that place even though i haven't been there)
+ love to love
+ hate people who smokes and DRINK (the drink part, as long as i'm there it's ok LOL! JK)
+ hate people who are plastic (c'mon! be yourself, you're not made out of plastic!)
+ an Emotional Poet
+ organized girl
+ ready for *any* adventure!
+ teddy = LOVE
+ dislikes strawberries
+ the only seafood i eat: shrimp, tuna, bangus(aka milk fish) and crabs
+ loves ACTING so much that it defines my LIFE
+ DANCING is after ACTING in my list of passions
+ knows how to play poker =|
+ TRUTH OR DARE
+ RISK TAKER
+ SWEET MYSTERY has a very special place in my heart ♥
+ is COMMiTED to what and who i LOVE
See my complete profile